Friday, July 10, 2009

Cutting the Apron Strings

Yesterday was a tough day for me. I had to cut my son off from car insurance. Now mind you he had fair warning – seven months. He had sufficient time to prepare. But he didn’t. When he was employed full-time he didn’t save much money. He did give me a few hundred dollars, but that won’t be enough.
I gave him the car three years ago when he graduated. The deal was I would pay insurance for one year. One turned into two, into…you get it. So why am I so bummed? A few reasons. One, the car is off the road, sitting in his driveway at his apartment. The license plates are sitting on my desk and I have to return them to DMV today. He was in high spirits when he dropped them off, but for me, it was difficult.
Cutting the mommy apron strings has never been easy with him. He’s my first born and he suffered the most, out of my three children, at the hands of my ex-husband. N was the one who was emotionally abused. Nothing was ever good enough. He couldn’t do anything right in my ex’s eyes. So, N’s self-esteem suffers. My current DH is the most wonderful, nurturing, self-esteeming raising man I’ve ever met. He’s brought my son out of his shell and I’ve watched him blossom.
N, has some disadvantages with his learning. But when he puts his mind to something he soars to new levels. It’s just getting his foot in the door.
My middle child is just the opposite. She has a new baby. Lives on her own and pays her own bills. She gets my support in different ways – watching the baby or a shoulder to cry on when she’s having a rough day.
Today’s a new day…I’m still a little bummed, but I have to stick to my guns. This tough love is tough – on ME! :-)
How do you handle cutting the apron strings?
They’re calling for a dry weekend and that USO (unidentified solar object) will make an appearance. God, I hope they’re right. Have a wonderful weekend.


  1. Hugs, Amber! I know exactly what you mean. They don't believe that it's hard on us, but it IS!

  2. ((((HUGS))))) I've been there, too. It's so hard.

  3. Thanks Regina and Cindy! I appreciate the kinds words.

  4. Oh honey! That has to be tough. Bailing out your baby is probably a natural instinct and yet you are doing him a great service by letting him face his own problems based on his own planning.

    Hang in there.

  5. I know, I know! *groans* But why does it have to be so freakin tough? lol

  6. Because you're a mom? I put mine through hell growing up until I had inconvenienced myself from lack of planning. Then it became important to figure things out. They're still there, and I know it, but they let me handle my own stuff. Nothing like going through it to learn it.

    Duct tape yourself to a chair and resist, baby. You'll get through this and still be an awesome mom.

  7. Amber,
    Been there, done that, still doing that! Do we ever stop being mothers and worry??
    We're in the "worried forever" mother club!

  8. Oh wow. Really tough. I struggle with the exact same stuff. My heart is right there with you.